NYC-Parents in Action Teen Scene 2025
What is life really like for NYC independent high school students?
February 24, 2025
By Himani Dixit
For over 30 years, NYC-PIA’s Teen Scene has provided parents with insights into the lives of NYC high school students. For the 2025 Teen Scene, a panel of 16 teens, from 9th to 12th grade, ages 14 to 18, spoke with former NYC-PIA president and panel moderator Lucy Martin Gianino about their experiences with academics, stress, parties, drinking, drugs, gender identity, consent, mental health and more.
How is school these days, post-pandemic? And how are you navigating your day?
Most kids, predictably, acknowledged that they are extremely busy with little free time.
“As a junior, it’s very stressful. Studying for the SAT/ACT, writing essays, and homework. I appreciate the little free time I have.“
“SATs have made a big comeback and are more important now than during the pandemic years.”
“As a freshman, the work comes in waves, all at once. It’s a big jump from middle school.”
Social media is a hot topic. Tell us what apps you're using and how you're using them.
“We use all the apps. As a senior, I’ve started a LinkedIn, as I think about my life in general, and not just my social life.”
“We use Instagram and Snapchat to communicate with each other. It does not dominate our social life, but supplements it.”
“I created my jewelry business through Instagram. It’s not all bad, it just depends on how you use social.”
How invasive is phone usage? Are kids addicted?
“I leave my phone out of my bedroom when I’m studying. It can be a distraction, but my phone also gives me a sense of independence.”
“Kids should use it in moderation, but it is very important for social purposes.”
“Technology is a double-edged sword. It can create unrealistic standards of beauty and also envy. There’s also FOMO with Snapchat location share because you can see where all your friends are and if they’re hanging out.”
“I went on a trip for 2 weeks and didn’t have it, which really helped us bond. I wish we didn’t have it while socializing – it would help everyone be more present.”
“I would tell parents not to restrict too much. It will make kids rebel more. Kids should learn balance themselves.”
“Freshman year, I was on my phone 4 hours a day. Now, I’ve cut back to 2 hours a day – I was definitely addicted.”
Is cyberbullying a problem? What about online predators?
In general, the kids were well aware of the dangers online, and were savvy about learning how to spot and block scammers and inappropriate messages or people.
“I don’t talk to people on the internet unless I know them in real life.”
“When my profile was public, I was getting a lot of predators and weird DMs – you have to learn to block people quickly.”
“Cyberbullying can happen because some schools are cliquier than others. A lot of people will talk behind your back, but not direct comments online or to your face.”
Moving on to a different topic: Why do you think teens are anxious?
“The same reason why anyone is anxious. It’s not specific to teens…”
“It’s hard to find a root cause. Sometimes it is self-inflected, but sometimes it’s because of parents putting pressure on a kid. The best thing parents can do is listen and provide support. Validate your child’s feelings, instead of denying they are anxious.”
“I have anxiety because my parents have sacrificed so much to give me all these resources, I feel like I owe it to them to perform and do well for my future.”
“College is very anxiety-provoking. Everyone is wondering how they will do in the process.”
“As an athlete, I have anxiety about balancing my sport with homework and also whether I will get recruited.”
Let's talk about colleges, as that seems to be a major source of anxiety.
“It’s starting earlier and earlier. Even in 10th 
grade, parents are talking about getting into an Ivy.”
“It’s so competitive – please tell your kids to keep where they are applying and what they are doing private. All these kids from the NYC area are applying to the same schools, and only a few will get in. That causes major stress.”
“Keep your ideas, like where you are doing internships, private. Don’t tell anyone, because it’s stressful, but also because people will copy your ideas.”
What support systems are offered at schools?
“It is usually addressed in our health class. For the more severe issues, people don’t use school counselors, they go to outside resources.”
Let's talk about socialization. Where and how are kids hanging out these days? What are you all doing?
“Freshman and sophomores go to venue clubs – they are paid ticket parties. There’s no alcohol at the venue, but people pre-game.”
“There is a big clubbing culture for juniors and seniors. People go to the Lower East Side. Fake IDs are like $60-$90.”
“House parties are still popular. Especially FRIBs (free cribs, or in other words, houses where the parents are not present).”
Are kids drinking? And what are they drinking? What about drugs?
“White claw, Smirnoff, sometimes jungle juice, which can be dangerous because it’s a mix of lemonade and juice with an unmeasured amount of alcohol.”
“Vaping and weed are the most common drugs. Geek carts, which are cartridges of weed oil, are becoming more popular.”
“Lots of kids drink, but it’s much less common to smoke weed. Cigarettes are making a comeback.”
“Vaping is very common; some schools even have vape detectors. Maybe half of kids use some kind of stimulant.”
“Don’t get mad at your kids or punish them for trying something. It’s better to have an open relationship and communicate with them.”
“Parents would do better if they tried to understand what is happening, not just jumping to conclusions.”
Are high schoolers having relationships?
“Depends on the person – some kids do want long term relationships, others just want to hook up.”
“Some seniors start relationships specifically so they can have a prom date.”
“Hook ups can mean something different at every school. It can range anywhere from making out to sex.”
“Advice to parents would be not to have your head in the sand. Talk to your kids about sex.”
How is for LGBTQIA+ students, specifically?
There was an overall consensus that this generation is a lot more accepting than their parents, and that “no one really cares” if someone identifies as LGBTQ. There is very little to no harassment.
In closing, how do you feel about being a teen in this age? What brings you joy?
The answers ranged from “hanging out with friends” to “enjoying every moment” to “loving senior year.” Some teens also felt that “they would be rewarded for their hard work” and they were “lucky to have opportunities and to be able to pursue their passions.” There was an overall sense of optimism and enjoying “coming into one’s own” as they learned to navigate friendships and embrace new responsibilities.